I had ended one of my last blogs with may i not go into a long slumber again vis a vis my blogging activity… and then i did.At the time, of writing the last blog, my mother lived with me and now she does not live in this world anymore.
My mother, my beautiful, funny mother and i her rebel first born, who would have thought, that we would be so close one day?
I love you ma. I want to say thank you to the universe, for the chance to be with you for the last ten years of your life. The chance to live together and grow together and witness each other’s lives as you grew from your late 60s to your late 70s and i from my late late 40s to my late 50s .
I love you ma. I miss you every day, I miss you when i get up with a start and then remember i no longer have to hurry into your room to check on you. I miss you when we have our morning tea, I miss you at lunch, i miss seeing stupid hindi serials with you. I miss colouring our hair together and singing songs together, I miss you painting late into the night, i miss your impish humour that you held on to even in the midst of your laboured asthmatic breath. I miss the look you gave me every time a doc looked at your xrays bewildered at the state of your lungs. I miss you sitting in the garden, waiting for your paan to be brought, I miss your fiercely independent spirit.
I hold you close to me
I release you to be so free
For I am in you and You are in me
Now and forever